My Ovaries And Uterus - My Choice

 

"77% percent of anti-abortion leaders are men.  100% of them will never get pregnant."  Planned Parenthood

Here we go again.  My mother was mostly conservative in her values, except when it came to a woman having her own individual rights in her marriage, and with her body.  My mother strongly believed that a woman should have control over those two things.  Here I am staring down the half-century mark in a few years in my age, and the arguments over abortion are still being tossed around for political scoring points. 

I am a divorced white, female growing up near Long Island's Northshore in a predominantly White and fairly affluent community.  During my high school years, I recall a few stories of girls from the neighborhood who had unwanted pregnancies from their boyfriends or a one-night stand.  Those girls quietly went away to visit relatives for a year or longer.  Sometimes for forever.  This was done to conceal the fact that most of them had abortions and were being banished until the rumors (or memories) went away.  A couple of them gave birth to babies that were immediately given up to some expensive adoption arrangement.

It was always sad to see this because most of those girls never came back to the neighborhood.  There were too many rumors and shame attached for them to return.  I only remember one girl who had a baby while still attending our high school.  However, she and her family eventually moved out of the neighborhood as they pursued whatever legal matters they had to with the father of their daughter's child. No matter what, every single one of those girls and their family's lives was never the same again.

The one story that I am fairly certain will never, ever happen in my old neighborhood, is that of any girl being raped and her family keeping that child.  This is especially if the rapist was of an obviously different race or ethnicity and skin color.  There is zero chance of that fetus ever being carried to a full term in my old neighborhood.  People with money will use it to cover up their shame, pain, or embarrassment no matter what their religion, or politics.  They covered up pregnancies for early pregnancies by boyfriends, one-night stands, and being out of wedlock.  There's no way that they would allow a rape baby from a Black, dark Latino, or Asian criminal.  This will be a problem for those women and families who have less access to financial or political power.

I have three children from my divorce, but I'm currently dating a wonderful Black man.  I still have a small chance of getting pregnant. I would have had my "interracial" baby back then or now.  My mother and father are Protestant, Christians and would have accepted me for an unexpected pregnancy as a teen or an adult - as long as I maintained a positive relationship with the father.  Even if we had to have moved from my old neighborhood and the aristocratic scowls of my old neighbors.  To my parents, life is more precious than politics or religious exhibitions.  But I don't think our current particular political shift is about protecting life.  I think it's purely political theater.  Because there's absolutely no way I could have emotionally endured keeping a baby after being raped.  Way too much pain to live with from conception to birth, upbringing, and thereafter.

Most of our American adoption and foster children systems are severely broken.  If you don't believe that, then research how many affluent White Americans adopt non-American babies.  Ironic isn't it?  Seeing Asian and Latino adopted babies in predominantly White or mixed affluent neighborhoods.  This is from some of the same people who would have never given birth to an "interracial" baby or adopted a non-white American child.   That's why this current time feels like such false bravado over the Christian "religious" uprising.  Where are these zealots when it comes to fixing the American adoption system or helping foster children?  We all know what's really going to happen with people who don't want to have their babies.  There's going to be nothing but more heartbreak, shame, and tragedy.

So we can't fix what's broken here, yet we now increase a situation where more children and families can get broken?  Regardless of the consequences?   I say my ovaries and uterus, my choice.