"Love finds you, not because you are seeking it, but because you are giving it," writes Matshona Dhliwayo. No truer words can have ever be spoken. Our fear of being hurt, or of being rejected, or our fear of being inadequate in our beauty or our lovemaking can sometimes incapacitate us women from living freely and enjoying ourselves in a relationship. These fears can be caused by our upbringing, the partner or partners that we choose, or by our own faulty vision of ourselves that we develop over time. My being married to Kenny, and our being together since my college years seemed like an ideal relationship. We had a house, multiple cars, three kids, and a boat, but I never felt like I could be myself around him. I had to be "an image" around him. When he grew tired of that image, he felt the need to constantly move on. He played an image too. His image was that he was a master of the universe and could never admit to a mistake...