Maddie's Coffee Klatch

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  "Love finds you, not because you are seeking it, but because you are giving it," writes Matshona Dhliwayo.  No truer words can have ever be spoken.  Our fear of being hurt, or of being rejected, or our fear of being inadequate in our beauty or our lovemaking can sometimes incapacitate us women from living freely and enjoying ourselves in a relationship.  These fears can be caused by our upbringing, the partner or partners that we choose, or by our own faulty vision of ourselves that we develop over time.  My being married to Kenny, and our being together since my college years seemed like an ideal relationship.  We had a house, multiple cars, three kids, and a boat, but I never felt like I could be myself around him.  I had to be "an image" around him.  When he grew tired of that image, he felt the need to constantly move on.  He played an image too.  His image was that he was a master of the universe and could never admit to a mistake...

  "Break her bed, not her heart" are very wonderful words to a very simple concept.  Us modern women may have become more independent than women from the last two generations.  And yes, we may be more complex and outspoken and even more aggressive when it comes to relationships.  Yet as tough, or as cold, or businesslike as some of us may portray ourselves, our inner secret is that we still want to be desired. We still want to be passionately loved, wanted, and controlled by safe hands.  We want to be taken to emotional places where we can just enjoy that physical and psychological place of desire and passion.  We want to please and be pleased.  We want it to soft, sensual, and sometimes challenging.  Sometimes we also want it hard and rough too.  Most of all, we want it to be emotionally and physically deep.  We want to feel connected inside.  So love us and we will love our lovers back just as deeply.